#become a consultant

[cansulta]

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[ew-selfish-art]

DpxDc AU: Justice League requires all of its youngest members to list at least one adult emergency contact in case something happens out in the field- And Lancer did tell Danny to put his number down if he needed help!

Lancer wanted to call CPS, wanted to call them for years, but something was wrong with his beloved town and the government agents that came were always… ill mannered. To say the least. So with the young Mr.Fenton appearing wounded in his class on multiple occasions, sleeping through lectures even more often, Lancer felt himself gradually accept that no other adult was going to step up to protect this child.

He figures out his Identity as Phantom and it makes his rage boil hotter than Dante’s sixth layer of hell. Danny refuses to abandon his parents (who continue to hunt him unknowingly), and he refuses to let any of his ghostly responsibilities fall wayside (this CW fellow is a real piece of work!).

But for all the things he expected when he told Danny that he could be trusted and could help- Ms. Manson and Mr.Foley coming to him for help, patching wounds, offering snacks and covering for Danny when attacks occurred in class- he hadn’t expected the Justice League to be knocking on his door.

Lancer blinked at the appearance of Batman in his classroom after the final bell, but then his stomach dropped.

TELLTALE HEART THATS THE BATMAN!!

“Phantom listed you as his emergency contact. Have you had any recent communication with him?” The deep, gravel voice startled Lancer.

Lancer checks his phone, Danny had skipped class today; and while Lancer was working with Danny to get him after school lessons and tutoring for all of the hours he missed, it was uncommon for him not to respond at Lancer’s text asking for a confirmation of his safety.

“Not in 24 hours, but I can message him again.” Lancer is shaking as he types on his phone to team phantom-Who wouldn’t be nervous at both the implications of Danny’s safety and the Batman??

Superman flies into the room from the open doorway, “No luck, without a heartbeat I can’t find him. Where ever they have him it’s lead lined or he’s keeping himself invisible.”

SCARLET LETTER ITS SUPERMAN!?!

Danny doesn’t reply to Lancer, and neither do Danny’s friends.

“He has two team members with whom he is inseparable, if none of them are responding then all three have been accosted. I’m coming with you until we find them.” Lancer declares and while he’s sure that Batman is unimpressed, Superman gives him a sad smile and nods.

Thus Lancer joins the Justice League for a day, Helps to save Team Phantom and Informs the takedown of an illegal government agency.

Batman also slides him some adoption papers and a card for a lawyer if Lancer decides to formally adopt Danny. Lancer also wins a Wayne Excellence Award for Teaching that year but he’s pretty sure the money is unrelated to Danny’s alter ego- after all, Lancer is a fantastic teacher.

[flwrkid14]

Tim Drake Accidentally Takes Over the World (and Didn’t Think to Mention It)

So, Janet somehow spent decades climbing her way into every government worth a damn, ruling the entire world from behind the scenes. And then, because the universe is apparently wild, she left it all to Tim.

Cut to Tim Drake, the brand-new, completely reluctant secret ruler of the entire planet. And he just… never really thought it was worth mentioning?

The Batfam finds out when Bruce stumbles across an encrypted memo traced to a mysterious Gotham office with Tim’s name on it.

Bruce, holding up the memo: “Tim. Want to explain why this document about, oh, international finance reforms is signed with your encryption key?”

Tim, not even looking up from his laptop: “Oh, yeah. That. Janet left me her ‘global influence portfolio’ or whatever. Mostly paperwork.”

The Batfam stares in total shock.

Dick sputters nearly dropping his coffee: "Wait—you’ve been managing world policies?!”

Tim, shrugging, barely paying attention as he emails the president of Germany: “Well, yeah. I figured someone had to keep things running. It's not that big a deal. I mostly just redirect some policies. You know, keep things running smoothly.”

Jason, absolutely cackling: “Are you telling me that little Replacement here is the reason for half the ‘global cooperation’ headlines?”

Tim, scrolling through emails: “They send me reports; I send suggestions. And honestly, they make it way more dramatic than it is. It's not that hard."

Barbara stares at him, half horrified, half impressed. “How did we not notice this?”

Tim blinks. “I mean, it’s not like I was actively hiding it. I assumed you guys knew I was… kind of managing these things?”

Cue utter disbelief.

Stephanie, laughing too hard to breathe: “Tim, do you have world leaders on speed dial?”

Tim, completely unfazed: “Only the important ones. They text, mostly. Oh—by the way, I might’ve influenced a minor arms control thing last week. Don’t worry; it’s all sorted.”

Bruce, looking like he’s two seconds from fainting: “Sorted? Tim, we're talking about you having global authority here. People notice these things."

Tim shrugs again as his phone buzzes with notifications. “Sure, but it’s not like they’re going to do anything too crazy. I just suggest stuff, and they listen. Honestly, it’s like herding really powerful, really overdramatic cats.”

Damian, scandalized: “You mean to tell me, Drake, that you’re manipulating world politics like it’s a game of checkers?”

Tim, still casual: “Manipulating’s a strong word. Like I said, it’s more just nudging things along.” His phone buzzes again. “Oh, hang on. France is panicking about their energy policy again.”

The Batfam tries to process the fact that Tim—Tim, who routinely forgets what day it is—is now, somehow, running the world.

And then his phone buzzes with a message from the UN Security Council.

Tim sighs, glancing down. “Oh, great. Looks like they’re debating nuclear arms again. Be right back.”

Meanwhile, the Batfam is left absolutely speechless, processing the fact that their Tim—scrawny, coffee-fueled Tim—is apparently one of the most powerful people on the planet. And to him its just another tuesday.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Shout out to all artists who had to work without any strong direction or instruction.

I wish you a merry “the client likes it anyways”

[malcontentonline]

Naruto doodle dump:

The next one is a reference to this fanfic I wanted to do a design for his seal and it became a whole thing.

these next few are doodles from my own silly time-travel fanfic I'll probably never write

[gloriousmonsters]

listened to most of The Art of War while hanging clothes at my job earlier and I'm going to just distill down the real advice for y'all without the twenty thousand similes and metaphors and such

Wars are expensive have them really fast

Don't kill your soldiers they need food and stuff

But sometimes put your soldiers into inescapable life or death situations because that's how you really get them to be workin' hard instead of hardly workin', y'know

Have more guys than the enemy and be smarter. The best way to win a war is to have every single favorable condition for winning a war. Hope that helps

DO NOT fight in a salt marsh

If your boss gives you a stupid order, don't follow that order

Be 15 min early to the battlefield

Attack the enemy's weak points. But also they might be faking weaknesses so don't attack if they seem weak. But attack their weak points. But also-

For the love of god don't let anyone read omens

[dubacheryking]

imagine a dirkjohn "meetcute" where dirk just shows up at john's apartment one day and he's like nice to meet you. i'm your boyfriend. and john is just like Do I Know You.

[discordiansamba]

he can't get out of the swamp fast enough.

he takes druk and flies straight to his next destination without hesitation. they're both exhausted when they arrive, so he hastily sets up camp and promptly collapses. thankfully, his sleep is free of strange dreams.

the next morning, he climbs down to the western air temple.

he's been here before, and he doesn't just mean that in the 'came here once in his past life' sense. he'd come here before with aang and master toph. it had taken a lot of damage during the hundred year war, and they were trying to rebuild it together. master toph thought helping with the effort would help with his training.

(he suddenly understood a little better why they'd spent the whole time watching him out of the corner of their eyes.)

shun wanders idly through the halls. this is where prince zuko finally joined the avatar's group. he wonders where it actually happened. he hadn't even known that it had gotten so damaged because azula had launched an assault on it, following after her brother and sokka after they'd broken sokka's father and suki out of the boiling rock.

(no wonder it hadn't been hard to find.)

he lingers in the western air temple for a few days, before he decides to move on. he's planning to go to ember island next.

emphasis on planning.

he's waylaid by a storm instead. it comes out of nowhere- the sky is blue one minute, and the next, he and druk are being thrown around by powerful winds. he clings, white-knuckled to druk's horns, burying his face to keep it out of the ferocious rain as much as he's trying to avoid seeing the lightning that flashes through the sky.

(at least he knows why he's so afraid of it now.)

ironically, maybe if he'd been watching where they were going, they wouldn't have wound up plummeting into the sea. he remembers keeping a firm grip on druk's horns, and then...

...then he wakes up back in the swamp.

he wakes up back in the swamp, and his hands are pale again. he reaches a shaky hand up, brushing it over the left half of his face. the skin there feels raised and rubbery. like there's a scar. he's not wearing his favorite reddish-brown tunic, or the cloth bandages he can't get out of the habit of wrapping around his arms. the royal armor of the fire nation weighs heavily on his body.

he's wearing prince zuko's face.

"do you get it now?"

he looks up, into his own eyes. prince zuko stares out of his face. he feels a surge of anger bubble in his chest. he's on his feet.

"that's not yours," he hisses. his voice sounds strange to him. too hoarse. all wrong.

(it's zuko's voice.)

the prince just shrugs. "sure it is."

"no, it's not," he takes a step forward, grabbing his collar, "-give it back."

"i can't," he says, "-you're the one who gave me this face."

"why would I do that?" he asks.

"because you wanted mine," he replies.

he lets go of his collar. that's not right. "I don't want to be you."

the prince just arches a brow. his left, like he's trying to mock him. the one on prince zuko's face was burned away. the skin around his eye feels impossibly tight. he wants to say something back, but he knows if he opens his mouth, it still won't be his own voice.

(he wakes up in a tatami room. his face is his own again.)

[jeyneofpoole]

do you ever cry because you want to achieve your dream so bad it starts leaking out of you

[nomaejie]

Boy night: POV your pathetic bossman keeps saying that the girl already loves him so there's no need to confess

[dr-james-wilson-oncologist]

hey I say this with utmost affection but this is what you look like when house talks to you, just fyi

Are you spying on me?

[falconre-re]

I have to mcfreaking troubleshoot my rain game mod. I have been putting it off

[spooky-activity]

Hi, i just wanted to say i love your comics about Kafka and Himeko trying to keep each other alive despite the universe apparently trying to kill them. I've never played Honkai Star Rail, but I love what you're doing with these two ladies.

OMG thank you so much for your kind ask!! It always makes me so happy when I manage to catch someone with my disaster sapphics who doesn’t play the game 🤭

The HSR universe is a dangerous place 😩😩😩 and what better place to forge bonds of trust than in the heat of battle! And the fallout of battle! And in the hospital after battle! Ok maybe I just like drawing battle but can you blame me? Explosions and swords are very cool

They’ve met one(1) time ingame and I’ve been enamored with their dynamic ever since, I’m SO happy you’re liking my smashing them together too 😩❤️

[angel-clouve]

Thinking about how people with cat allergy will probably consider Darkwick Academy as the equivalent of hell on Earth. Even worse if they actually do love cats but can't even get close to one without at least getting an itchy nose... imo gotta be one of the worst combos to ever exist 🥲

(Imagine on top of not being able to fully concentrate on academic matters due to their allergy acting up every now and then they also can't leisurely pet the cute, friendly little furballs that can be found all over campus? which ironically are also the source of all of the misery they're currently experiencing The tragedy, my friend... oh, the tragedy! *cue the dramatic sound of biwa playing courtesy of Zenji*)

But I'm not going to be surprised if Professor Nicholas or any other anomaly researchers has invented some sort of anomalous medicine that can temporarily (or maybe even permanently?) cure any type of allergies triggered by animal furs, because so far we haven't encountered any students or staffs who complain about the insane amount of cats the academy have and its consequences towards the health of people who have allergy reaction towards them (yet?) 🤔

(The more crack-ish theory is one of the requirements to pass Darkwick's entrance exam is to pass the cat allergy test included in the health evaluation test but hey there's no way they use such a specific parameter to determine the eligibility of someone to become a student in the most prestigious academy in Japan, right? 😀)

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Leave wildlife alone. He probably bites.

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